Friday, February 1, 2008

**KERTHWAP!!** Holy Life Lesson Batman!

I received a blow to my self image yesterday, but I'm incredibly grateful for it. I'll keep this (relatively) short and say that I'm now able to define some not-so-wonderful things about myself that have been roiling around in a bothersome fog for several years. I knew they were in there, inside that fog, but I couldn't grasp hold of them in any meaningful or productive way and actually stop them from surfacing in my behavior.
The symbolism of the person through whom I received this message holding an umbrella and repeatedly tapping me on the leg when they made a particularly salient point was not lost on me. I've taken repeated emotional beatings in the past five years or so as a result of these issues, but never quite learned my lesson.
I really don't believe in "a god" but I do believe in some form of fate, or destiny. There are things we each need to learn in life, and you will keep on fumbling around and recreating the same situation in your life until you take the lesson to heart and change. Somehow being "beaten" with an umbrella was the appropriate symbolic gesture, along with some very frank yet caring conversation, to get through my fog. Boy, do I ever feel schooled.

Three good things:
1. I emphatically don't hate the messenger of my lesson, which is nice for a change.
2. I'm feeling rather enlightened, even though I know I have some hard work ahead.
3. The strange and symbolic and forceful way this came about blows my mind, which is pretty cool.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

We can't solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.

or, if you'd rather:

It's not that I'm so smart, it's just that I stay with problems longer.

Juliette said...

Enlightenment in any form is a path to thinking about problems in a new way :) I am lucky to have experienced what I did.

Melissa said...

4. You have a great set of gams :)

SadieMBeagle (Georgiana's friend)

Juliette said...

Thank you! Truthfully, they are gams of days-gone-by...but I probably shouldn't publicize that too widely ;)